[Subtitles by danielsangeo]
I could just burn this place down.
There was a lot of junk at
the bottom of the stairs;
I could start a fire there,
everybody comes running:
then I could loot the building
while they're putting it out.
Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself.
My situation's only maybe hopeless,
not set-fire-to-everything hopeless.
Look at you. You're like
a magical white rabbit.
If you run away from me, that
means I should follow you, right?
Oh, I know THAT look. That's
the look of wisdom right there.
MAN #1: Was that you knocking?
MAN #1: I didn't know we still had a door.
The door to your mind, man.
Dammit, I know you have the answers,
but I don't want to seem too
eager. That wouldn't be cool.
Well at least somebody's on
the path to enlightenment.
MAN #2: Oh. I thought you were a cop.
WOMAN #1: He's one of us.
WOMAN #1: I told you they'd
be coming for us next.
MAN #2: Just this once I hope you're wrong.
I should leave. Something's up here.
I don't want any guilt by association.
These people are running
a commune or something
where they don't think anything of
a stranger walking into their home.
WOMAN #2: I can't take it anymore.
MAN #3: Everything's going to be okay.
Oop, trouble in paradise.
Yeah, this has "not gonna
last" written all over it.
Hm. It's either a commune or
an open house with bad timing,
but I doubt that. That lady
didn't look like a realtor.
MAN #4: Psst! Hey you! In here!
You look like the type.
MAN #4: Head for the roof!
I don't have any--
MAN #4: There's no time to lose!
MAN #5: HERE THEY COME! HELP!
Hey, you know what? When people are
screaming and running one direction,
I find it's best to just not question that
and assume they have more
current information than I do.
I don't like learning things the hard way--
MAN #4: Get in here, quick!
MAN #4: Keep moving! Head for the roof!
--but I love letting other
people learn the hard way for me.
Oh, shit! Those were gunshots!
I knew this place was bad news.
Those people obviously
have their own problems
and I'm going to let them keep them.
Jesus! They're shooting at me!
Okay, let's see you chase me here.
Gravity still doesn't love me.
Or rather, it loves me too much.
This is the second-worst day of
my life! Or maybe third-worst!
Oh, this is something! I'll take it.
Okay... that's one cause
of death off the list.
[groaning]
Owwww-hoo-hoo-owww...
ALYX: Dr. Freeman, I presume?
You a nurse? I need morphine!
ALYX: You'd better hurry.
Hey, we should get their guns.
ALYX: I don't think it occurred--
They're not here. They don't
even have their stun prods.
She must've collected them and
thrown them out the window.
How did she take down a room full of cops?
Must've been an explosive,
huh? A nail bomb or something.
You know, where I come from, killing
cops means they send a lot more cops.
ALYX: I'm Alyx Vance. My father
worked with you back in Black Mesa?
ALYX: I'm sure you don't
remember me, though.
I'm not sure I remember your father.
ALYX: Man of few words, aren't you?
Listen, smart-ass. I don't--
Oh, okay. Well fuck you then.
Yeah, I talk a lot, but that's
because I GET THINGS DONE!
ALYX: Remember him from Black Mesa?
Your old administrator.
ALYX: Don't get my dad started on Dr. Breen.
There were hundreds of people
with doctorates at Black Mesa.
Did you check behind those barrels?
What's with this "Get Smart" shit?
[humming Get Smart theme]
ALYX: Funny you showing up
on this day in particular.
[humming Get Smart theme]
ALYX: We've been helping
people escape the city on foot.
Why'd you jump that? There's stairs here.
ALYX: It's a dangerous route to my
father's lab, through the old canals?
That's bad for your knees. I know.
ALYX: Today, we're finally on
the verge of having a better way.
You're just jumping for no reason.
ALYX: Heh. Here. Let me buy you a drink.
That is a GREAT idea. You're a good nurse.
Oh. You meant the vending machine.
ALYX: Oh, and by the way.
ALYX: Nice to finally meet you.
Okay, time to go see the
chief. You can wait outside.
Hm! Nice setup! Yeah, those
tanks could hold full bodies.
KLEINER: Blast that little--
Where did she get to?
I'm just going to act like
I've been here the whole time.
KLEINER: Lamarr! Come out of there!
ALYX: Uh-oh. Everything
all right, Dr. Kleiner?
You're ruining everything!
KLEINER: Well, almost all right. Lamarr
has gotten out of her crate again.
Don't make him explain himself!
KLEINER: ...I'd suspect
Barney of trapping and--
KLEINER: Goodness! Gordon Freeman!
KLEINER: It really is you, isn't it?
ALYX: I found him wandering around
outside. Bit of a troublemaker, isn't he?
KLEINER: We owe a great deal to Dr. Freeman.
KLEINER: Even though trouble
does tend to follow in his wake.
That's a good way of
putting it. It follows ME.
KLEINER: I must say, Gordon, you've
come at a very opportune time.
KLEINER: Alyx has just installed the
final piece for our resurrected teleport.
ALYX: I can't take any credit
for the breakthrough, doctor.
KLEINER: Nonsense. Your talents
surpass your loveliness.
ALYX: Let's just see if
this thing works, okay?
BARNEY: Well, is he here?
Are those doors still open?
BARNEY: Man, Gordon.
You've stirred up the hive!
Yeah, I bet! She killed five cops!
They're going to smoke this place.
BARNEY: We can't keep him here long, doc.
It'll jeopardize everything we've worked for.
ALYX: Don't worry. He's coming with me.
No, you SHOULD worry! This--
KLEINER: This is a red letter day.
KLEINER: We'll inaugurate the new
teleport with a double transmission.
BARNEY: You mean it's
working? For real this time?
BARNEY: Because, I still have
nightmares about that cat.
KLEINER: Now now, there's
nothing to be nervous about.
KLEINER: We've made major strides
since then. Major strides.
Are you thick? He obviously
killed a cat in an experiment.
You people don't know Kleiner.
KLEINER: Oh dear, you're right. I almost
forgot. Barney, I'll give you the honor.
BARNEY: I've gotta get back on my shift--
Yeah! You gotta go
find that cop-killer, huh?
Man, I'm getting a bad vibe here.
I was hoping Kleiner and I could
get back to doing some real science,
but now I think there's so
much heat, my whole future's--
Kleiner, this is dark.
But your lab, your rules.
If you want to kill your assistant,
I'm not going to stop you.
KLEINER: Certainly not! Never fear, Gordon.
She's de-beaked and completely harmless.
KLEINER: The worst she might do is attempt
to couple with your head... fruitlessly.
BARNEY: Get that thing away from me!
The years have not been kind, huh?
KLEINER: No, not up there! No, no!
KLEINER: Careful, Lamarr!
Those are quite fragile!
KLEINER: Oh, fie! It'll be another week
before I can coax her out of there.
How many people HAVE you killed, Kleiner?
ALYX: Hah, Barney, you're
not an animal-person.
You know, I thought he was the dumb
one, but you're as green as they come!
You know they mind-rape you, right?
You're like this little bobble toy here.
You're going to learn things the hard way.
Oh no. He wants me to put that on?
Kleiner, I've got a lot of
bad memories with those suits.
Oh no. He's giving me the look.
I'd better do what he says.
I know that look.
I think I'm the only person here who realizes
just how dangerous Kleiner actually is.
Yep. These hands are made for strangling...
KLEINER: Well, Gordon, I see your HEV
suit still fits you like a glove...
KLEINER: ...at least the glove parts do.
KLEINER: I've made a few modifications but
I'll just acquaint you with the essentials.
I think I AM more buff. The
invasion was a marathon!
KLEINER: "The Mark V
Hazardous Environment Suit
KLEINER: "has been redesigned
for comfort and utility."
Hey, what about the helmet?
[distant alarms]
KLEINER: Oh, dear.
[distant alarms]
BARNEY: Doc, we don't have time for this!
[distant alarms]
See, this is what I mean.
BARNEY: At least get that
suit juiced up, Gordon.
KLEINER: Good idea. There's
a charger on the wall.
Oh, so I can turn on that
voice again? No, I'm good.
KLEINER: I've modified your suit to
draw power from Combine energy outlets
KLEINER: which are plentiful
wherever THEY patrol.
"They"... That's the Tripods, right?
ALYX: Meanwhile, let's
get this show on the road.
Yeah, this place is
going to get raided soon,
but I'm not worried about
Kleiner. He's a survivor like me.
Yeah, look at that. I bet I haven't
seen half of his bag of tricks.
He probably just has to hit two switches
and his printer will
transform into a shotgun.
That prick's doing that on
purpose. I'll deal with him later.
Hey, that's me in the photo!
I don't even remember
taking this. Was I high?
Okay, that guy next to
Kleiner looks familiar...
and there are a lot of
the Einstein-hair guys...
...I don't recognize anyone else here.
Why does this look like
it was taken in the 1800s?
What's going on?! Is this
an alternate reality?
I've been hopping across
space and time here...
Oh, this should be good. We're
going to have some REAL fun.
KLEINER: Gordon, why don't you position
yourself near the panel over there
KLEINER: and wait for my word?
With pleasure!
ELI: Izzy, are you there?
KLEINER: Yes, yes, Eli. Bit
of a hold up on this end.
KLEINER: You'll never guess who found
his way into our lab this morning.
ELI: That's not who I think it is, is it?
KLEINER: Indeed it is. And it's our
intention to send him packing straightaway
KLEINER: in the company
of your lovely daughter.
"We've come for your daughter, Chuck."
ELI: We're all set on this end.
Ha ha ha. You're going to get a show here.
KLEINER: ...parameters to
CY base and LG orbifold...
KLEINER: ...Hilbert inclusive.
Conditions could hardly be more ideal.
BARNEY: That's what you said last time.
ALYX: Hey, yeah. About that cat?
Yeah, you might die.
KLEINER: Initializing in 3... 2. .. 1!
2... 1!
KLEINER: Initializing in 3... 2... 1!
Awww...
KLEINER: Oh, fiddlesticks. What now?
Man...
ALYX: Uh, doctor? The plug.
KLEINER: Dear me. You're right.
KLEINER: Gordon, would
you mind plugging us in?
ALYX: It's right there, Gordon.
You realize that the voltage is so
high to blow the plug out of the wall,
this can't be close to stable.
ALYX: You're going to let
Gordon throw the switch?
KLEINER: Gordon? Go right ahead.
This is going to be like one of
those dunking booths at the fair,
except instead of dunking you in water,
you're going to get dunked out of existence.
ALYX: OoooooOOOOOOOHHHH--!
YES!
ALYX: OoooooOOOOOOOHHHH--!
That was beautiful! This is
what it's all about right here.
Kleiner, you have any champagne?
KLEINER: Well? Did it work?
KLEINER: Thank goodness. My
relief is almost palpable.
ELI: Fantastic work, Izzy.
KLEINER: Well, I can't take all the credit.
Dr. Freeman proved an able assistant.
ELI: Let's go ahead and
bring Gordon through now.
KLEINER: Right you are. Speak
to you again in a few moments.
BARNEY: Good job, Gordon,
throwing that switch and all?
BARNEY: I can see your MIT
education really pays for itself.
And what are you?! A middle-aged
high school dropout?!
KLEINER: Gordon, as soon as you're
in position, we'll send you to Eli's.
[distant alarms]
BARNEY: And not a moment too soon.
I'M A DOCTOR, SHITMUNCH!
MY RESEARCH WENT INTO THIS!
Not that you'd understand!
If I find a dog toy for you to chew
on, I'll be sure to bring it to you!
Taking shit from a guard...
No wonder Kleiner doesn't mind killing you.
KLEINER: Excellent.
Initializing in 3... 2... 1.
Hey, this one's not green.
BARNEY: Good luck out there, Gordon.
Yeah, you'd BETTER try
to get on my good side.
KLEINER: Bon voyage, and best of
luck in your future endeavors.
Ah, I knew it. Shut it down...
BARNEY: It's your pet,
the freaking headhumper!
Hey! The current's off! SHUT IT DOWN!
SHUT IT DOWN! THIS IS
BLACK MESA ALL OVER AGAIN!
ALYX: He's coming through, dad.
Oh my god, BEHIND YOU! WHAT'S BEHIND YOU?!
IT'S RIGHT THERE! STOP IT!
MOSSMAN: Something's drawing him away.
BREEN: What's the meaning
of this? Who ARE you?!
BREEN: How did you get in here?
KLEINER, SHUT IT DOWN! JUST SHUT IT DOWN!
IT'S GOING TO SEND ME BACK
TO THAT ALIEN WORLD AGAIN!
YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME, KLEINER! DON'T
SEND ME BACK THERE! I CAN'T GO BACK!
IT'S STILL THERE! KILL IT!
BREEN: I'm all but certain it was...
BREEN: ...Gordon Freeman.